A singer with a Swedish disco band who performed at this year’s Eurovision has told of the “dehumanising” and “distressing” consequences of Brexit after her British husband’s application to remain in Sweden was rejected.

Tess Merkel Solomons, a singer with the band Alcazar, said it felt as if her husband, Kenny Solomons, an actor and entrepreneur, was being “punished” because he was a British citizen in Sweden after Brexit.

Their ordeal began three years ago when Solomons, who had been living in the country since 2012, learned from one of his British employees that he should have applied to remain in Sweden by the end of 2021. He quickly applied but was this rejected in August this year on the grounds that he was late.

Merkel Solomons said she felt embarrassed to be Swedish and could not understand the approach of the authorities given that Solomons is a fully integrated member of society, a stepfather to her two children, paying taxes and a Swedish speaker.

“It’s absolutely disgusting. The way this is being handled is beyond belief. It is almost as if they are discriminating, punishing British citizens,” she said.

“Kenny came here full of entrepreneurship, he works, he set up businesses, learned Swedish. He pays taxes, employs people.

“We did not receive a single piece of mail to say ‘please be aware you need to apply to stay in the country because of Brexit’. Nothing from the Swedish government, nothing from the British embassy.

“Is the EU really saying to me you do not have any kind of protection after Brexit? Shouldn’t they stand up for these people?”

The migration department, the equivalent of the UK’s Home Office, said it could not comment on individual cases but said its data showed it was dealing with 452 late applications, with 45 approved in 2023.

The late applications include applications from family members of some of the 12,000 people who applied on time, so the number of cases like Solomons’ may be much smaller.

Campaigners in the Facebook grassroots group Brits in Sweden say they have not found a single late applicant whose application has been accepted and there are still individuals discovering they should have applied.

David Milstead, a British professor of physics in Stockholm and a voluntary campaigner in Brits in Sweden, has been raising concerns over Sweden’s approach for two years, battling to get statistics or answers from the authorities.

“There was no mass mailing of registered Brits by the Swedes, despite the fact that they know our addresses and many of us have digital inboxes for communications from government authorities,” he said.

“Also, the media outreach from the Swedish government was minimal. It was a lucky Brit in Sweden who encountered a message from the Swedish authorities. On top of this, after contacting the state authorities or reading their webpages, Brits often received conflicting information. What we’re seeing is an avoidable mess that is ruining lives.”

Solomons, who has returned to the UK, says he cannot understand how Brexit could have caused so much damage to his family life. He had been a successful commercials actor and then an entrepreneur running seven restaurants and barber shops, continuously employing people in Stockholm including through the pandemic.

He said: “I had 38 staff, my own employees. My priority was to try to save the company through Covid. That was my priority to save my company and to save people’s jobs and I had zero idea that Brexit meant I had to apply to remain in the country again. My main priority was to make sure others were OK – that I got from my mother, who always said put others first.

“It wasn’t until another Brit, that I employed, said ‘you should have sent in a piece of paper last week’ that I knew I had to do it. So I spent two years trying to save my company and employees all through Covid and at the end, sadly, it worked out well for everyone else but not the employer.”

He added: “I’m told there is absolutely zero chance that I am allowed to reside in Sweden with my wife and kids. I’m told I can appeal in five years. I can appeal to the European court, but I want to be speak openly.

“I am afraid. I even get nervous talking about this because I am afraid if I put one foot out of line I’m going to even lose my opportunity to be able to visit my wife and kids and my home as a tourist.”

Although Solomons pays a mortgage and has had a family home in Sweden for more than the five years that would have made him a permanent resident of the country, he is afraid that if he breaks a single rule by going back to see his family he will risk incurring a two-year entry ban.

“I’m afraid If I continue to fight this, my health might not be able to keep up,” he said. “I can turn up as a tourist by law, but it’s at the discretion of border control. I just want to go and see my wife and I want to go home and pay the mortgage and pay the bills and make sure the kids are OK.”

The couple said the British embassy in Stockholm was of no help. “They basically said they could not interfere with Swedish law,” said Merkel Solomons.

A spokesperson for the UK Foreign Office said it could not comment on individual cases but that it had raised the wider issue with Sweden and the EU.

“We have raised the high refusal rates with the Swedish and EU authorities and continue to work with them to ensure British nationals have the latest advice and guidance,” they said.